Amusements During Church

Here is a little dialogue between a Mom and her adorable (3 year old?) son, which I later learned his name was Zack (which I dunno what spelling it is Zack Morris or Zach Gilford? I'll go with Morris):

Zack: Mom, I wanna donut.
Mom: After mass.
Zack: Is it gonna be done in a minute?
Mom shakes her head no.

This all took place within the first 5 minutes of mass. This kid needed to realize there is at least 55 more minutes until he could get that donut.

If he does get the donut hopefully he doesn't get it all over his face like this:



After the donut talk he continued coloring in his Dora the Explorer coloring book.

Zack then decides to place a bunch of stickers on top of one of the coloring book pages. He just keeps taking sticker after sticker and piling them in just one section of the page. He had a plethora of stickers such as shiny cars, Shrek, Dora the Explorer, SpiderMan, and my personal favorite Thomas the Tank Engine.

Which reminds me did anyone watch Shining Time Station? I remember Ringo Starr as the Conductor.



Anyway, later on with the weekly offering Zack is all excited to put the money in the basket. After he does so, he follows the basket until he can't see it anymore. I remember doing that with my mother when I was younger, being the one to put the envelope in the basket was so cool. Why was that? And was it to teach us anything? Like putting money in the basket for the church made you feel good so you will do it when you get older? Well I can attest to you that it doesn't because I don't have any extra money to give to the church after my rent and bills. And really I would rather buy Friday Night Lights on DVD.

The church I go to is also a school, so at the end of Mass there are a few students who read their "why they like St. Whatever School". They don't do this every weekend, just when it is give money to the school weekend. I have heard a few of these over the past 3 years and they always make me chuckle. Here are some highlights:

A 6th grade girls likes her school because of the "kind and considerate staff" (something tells me she didn't write this all by herself) and she also likes the school because she has a lot of friends "and [she] never feels dumb".

A third grade boy likes the school because it is "fun to play different computer games in computer class" and he "likes going to the library because [he] likes reading books". I like the fact he likes to read!

Usually the students say they like recess or the food, which is funny because who usually likes their school cafeteria food? Wow, I am writing a lot of "likes" in this entry.

Of course, the fact that I am making fun of kids, not paying attention during Mass, and wanting to buy TV DVDs instead of giving money to the church means I am definitley going to Hell now, aren't I!?